Here I am lying here in bed. Its now midnight, which officially signifies the beginning of the end. Why? Because today is my last first day of college.
The feelings I have right now are: happy, nervous, excited, anxious, and proud to name a few. I think back and relate to myself as a little girl on the first day of school-nervous and anxious because I was uncertain of what lied ahead. Palms sweaty, voice quivering, I had to let go of my mom and dad’s hand and be my own independent person and set out in the big world, which is quite fitting for my situation now.
I think back at how much I have evolved academically and personally over these past several years. Being the person who relied on a social life rather than caring about her grades in high school to someone who now beats herself up about receiving B’s with a 3.7 GPA. I look back at that girl in high school and compare her to the woman I am today and find myself in disbelief of how far I’ve come and have changed for the better.
My very first day at community college, I didn’t know where I would end up, or how long it would take me to get to where I was going. I quickly learned it wasn’t so much about the destination, but rather the successes and struggles that got me to this very moment today. The long nights of studying, the stress of completing all of my assignments, the anxiety of taking tests, and ultimately my achievement of receiving my associates and receiving early admission into CSULA.
Throughout this journey, I have met the most incredible people. People with depth, people with struggles, people who were going through the same obstacles I was– to be somebody in this world. I never really believed the saying, “your college friends will last a lifetime,” until I started to realize that some of my high school friendships started to fade as new people began to take those places. To the friends I have made over the course of these five years, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You have made this journey what it is and even more enriching and rewarding.
To the love of my life. You have had a front row seat of my evolution. You were right there and knew that 16 year old girl that once existed. You took and endured my frustrations, my stress, and meltdowns throughout these past years and have always encouraged me that I could get through it. You have always been my biggest supporter and truly believe I could not have done this without you by my side. In a few short months, together we get the opportunity to walk across that stage and celebrate another milestone of our lives together.
Only five classes stand between me and a college degree and while it may be difficult, I can see the finish line and I’m not stopping now. Being the first generation college graduate makes me that much more motivated to cross that finish line. This, is the beginning of the end.