Today’s post is a little different. I wanted to write something that I could look back at year’s from now to remember how I am feeling right now.
With graduation 27 days away I am tired, stressed, anxious, excited, optimistic, and nervous to name a few. I jotted down all of my deadlines last night and imported them into my calendar to give myself a better view of everything coming up to help me prioritize for these next three busiest weeks of my life. Two papers (8 page and 5 page), three final exams, a project presentation, a project portfolio, and my senior thesis stand between me and my Bachelor’s degree.
I vividly remember as a little girl, probably in third or fourth grade, talking with my friends during recess and trying to count with our fingers how many years of school we had left until we never had to go ever again. A sign of relief came upon me when I looked at my hand to only see eight or nine fingers up. This relief turned to discouragement when one of my friends said, “Wait!!! THEN COLLEGE! How many years do we go to college?” Knowing those years would exceed the fingers I had left on my hand, I looked at my fingers and sighed.
These past five years of college have been the fastest and slowest five years. They have been filled with laughs, tears, stress, motivation, and pride. Pride that is rooted through knowing I’m the first in my family to pave the path I was creating. Proud to know that I was taking my education into my own hands by paying for my books, parking passes, school expenses, and student loans. Proud to become this person I am today as a result of my own self-discipline and work ethic. I strayed away from the person I was made out to be in high school and into this new inspiration. From the person in high school who never did homework and had a plethora of missing assignments to someone who is graduating with honors, awarded with deans list, and not having any missing or late assignments throughout the course of five years. This is not intended to boast, but take pride in what I have done on my own, as I should.
Tyler has been such a positive light in my life. The person who always encourages me to get out of bed and go to class on the days I was feeling unmotivated, the one who comforted my worries, the one who packed my lunches, and the one who fought his tired eyes to proofread my papers or listen to my presentations before bed. Thank you for being who you are and inspiring me to my full potential. You make me a better person in every way. I can never thank you enough for being my very best friend when times get tough, my love when I am stressed among belief and just need snuggles, and the support system I needed– I could not have done it without you.
What’s next? I don’t know- which I think is the beauty of it all. Life is too short to be stressed. I know life will guide me where I’m meant to go and I’m at peace with that. I do know that I don’t need anyone to be “proud” of me because I am proud of me and that’s all I need.
The best is yet to come